From International Viewpoints (IVy) Issue 7 - August 1992
New Realities
By Mark Jones, USA
Forgiveness - A Missing Basic for Higher States and Evolvement
While many of the basic principles of achieving higher states were covered
by LRH in his writings, one of the most important was barely touched on.
This is 'foregiveness' which in my search I've only found mentioned in
"What is Greatness". In this essay LRH wrote, "If there is any saintly
quality, it is not to forgive". He described this actions as "rather
censorious". Perhaps he was using the term in a particular context, rather
than that given in the American Heritage dictionary, i.e. "To grant pardon
without harboring resentment", for in the same essay he stated that "The
hardest task one can have is to continue to love one's fellows despite all
the reasons why not. And the true sign of sanity and greatness is to so
continue". Later in the article he wrote, "The real lesson is to learn to
love. He who would walk scatheless through his day must learn this. Never
use what is done to one as a basis for hatred. Never desire revenge. To
love in spite of all is the secret of greatness, and may well be the
greatest secret in this universe". So, it appears that philosophically, he
may have considered some form of release of resentment to be important.
Obviously he and those he schooled to run the organization he helped create
must have had some confusion in this area, for their subsequent attitudes
and actions deviated from this principle. Unfortunately, unforgivable
enemies proliferated. The tech does not appear to address the most
important area of forgivness, the forgiveness of self.
Why is self forgiveness so important? - Because without it we will deny
ourselves the most vital element in our evolvement, self love - . Many of
us are at or nearing a point of opening up and moving to new levels of our
spiritual potential. We are ready to fan the spark that can ignite the
light of enlightenment. The most critical element in being able to do this
is to - give ourselves a full measure of self love - . This, in essence, is
what lights the spark. Otherwise, because of feeling unlovable and thus
undeserving, we unwittingly hold ourselves back. The primary reason we do
so is because of our lack of self forgiveness, and as a result, our
unwillingness to forgive others. They serve as mirrors of our own
unforgiveableness.
Self-forgiveness
Because we perceive reality through the filters of our beliefs,
particularly our beliefs about ourselves, if, as a result of our lack of
self forgiveness, we do not love ourselves fully, we're not likely to
forgive or love others. As Lao Tzu wrote in - The Way of Life - in about
600 B.C.:
"Having what is called insight,
A good man, before he can help a bad man,
Finds in himself the matter with the bad man".
So it is important to forgive ourselves first. Knowing how to do this is
important. When we've been troubled by something we've done in the past
we've probably been told by well meaning people, "Just forgive yourself",
or "just get your overts off in sesion". However, while doing this may blow
some charge, it's probable that we'll need a more in depth handling and
taking of responsibility to achieve a more complete forgiveness and
release.
Catherine Ponder, in her revealing book, - The Dynamic Laws of Healing - ,
places great emphasis on forgiveness as an essential element in healing. As
a psychic who has had great successes in healing, she states, "It is an
immutable mental and spiritual law when there is a health problem, there is
a forgiveness problem. You must forgive if you want to be permanently
healed". She goes on to add, "Health cannot be accepted by a body that is
filled with the poisons generated by unforgiveness". Ancient philosophers
had a basic statement they uses for healing, " - There's nothing to hate -
".
She further states: "When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound
to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than
steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that line and get free. If
only one person will dare to forgive, the problem can be solved, regardless
of who else is involved, and whether anyone else wants to forgive".
Coming as she does from a religious orientation, she suggests the frequent
use of a simple prayer: "I forgive everything, everyone, every experience,
every memory of the past or present that needs forgiveness. I forgive
positively everyone".
Deeper Approach
Other metaphysical sources such as Lazaris suggest more in depth
approaches. These start with self forgiveness, a vital action to be able to
create the self love to light the spark of enlightenment. We begin by
talking to the child and adolescent in each of us, not as circles on an
explanatory drawing, but as live energies. There is a living child and
adolescent which is still part of each of us.
They point out that we create our own realities including the illusion of
time, i.e. that things happen sequentially and that there is a past which
has gone away and no longer exists. But, in fact, growth is not linear. It
expands and travels in all directions simultaneously. When we become more
we don't lose anything we are. We become more. As we become adults, we
still have a living, feeling child and adolescent in us. In childhood it's
likely that we may have had certain feelings that we never got enough love.
That can be the thing which causes the child within to feel unforgivable,
for not being deserving of love, to feel powerless and like a victim. The
adolescent may feel powerless because of a big need for recognition, and
dramatize being a martyr, or being 'better than' in an attempt to
compensate. So an important part of forgiveness is to go into a meditation
and be with our child and adolescent. In this live experience listen to and
talk with them, and give them the love and recognition they didn't feel
they got. Assist them in forgiving their manipulation to control, their
rage for not being loved enough and other things they did which they
considered discredible.
Barriers to Forgiveness
We may have barriers to forgiving ourselves or others. Obviously, we will
need to remove those that are affecting us. Some that might apply are:
a. Forgiveness is weakness. It's whimping out.
b. Only God can forgive; it's arrogant for me to do so.
c. It is shallow, too easy. There has to be more suffering.
d. It might open up a pandora's box of emotions that I can't handle. I
don't want to get hurt again.
e. Something will die in me, a piece of the past. (Indeed there will be. We
may be tied to some root emotions such as anger, fear, loneliness,
hopelessness, shame etc., and new, positive emotions will replace them
which we'll have to adapt to and live with.)
f. Once I've forgiven and been forgiven I'll have to be perfect.
g. If I forgive them, I'll have to be friends with them. (Note - there is
no such requirement to reap the benefits of forgiveness).
The Stages of Forgiveness
When we start the process of forgiving, we are likely to go through stages.
The first is denial. The next is self blame. Following that, self pity. The
fourth is indignation, the righteous stage, the outrage state. The fifth is
the realization that we - caused or allowed it - . The sixth is freedom,
the realization that we are in the driver's seat, and final one is
integration.
Following this approach, the steps of forgiving are:
A. Look and handle our resistances.
B. Really release the emotions including grief, guilt, depression and
disorientation.
C. Be conscious of the steps and keep moving through.
D. Remember to - always - forgive - yourself first - while being aware that
you caused it or allowed it.
E. Forgive the - why - and let the what follow. Maybe you will never
forgive the what, but you can the why.
F. State what is to be forgiven in writing. In doing this, talk to your
inner child and adolescent.
G. Write down (1) what you want to forgive, (2) why you want to forgive,
and (3) feel it. Then go into a meditation and do the forgiving. Repeat as
necessary.
I can provide a two cassette tape set which includes a detailed theoretical
discussion and two guided meditations for forgiveness by Lazaris for $
12.50 which includes the postage.
Sample Session
A typical meditation, (Editorial note. A meditation is similar to dianetic
reverie and/or to a solo session, in which one can allow ones attention to
move outside the physical bounds of space and time, thereby speed up one's
increase of awareness, and by the use of metaphoric symbols to which the
reactive or subconscious mind responds, reprogram it. Ed..) given in the
symbolic imagery to which the subconscious mind responds is as follows: It
can be done with one person guiding another into a relaxed, meditative
state and then giving them the following guidance, or a person can record
the instructions to relax and follow the sequence on a tape and follow the
recorded instructions. The tapes I referred to above have done this quite
professionally, and can produce major changes and quite powerful results.
Close your eyes. Allow yourself to relax. Let the tension drain out of your
feet, and slowly spread up and through the rest of your body. Feel it
draining away all of the doubts and past tensions. Let your eyelids relax.
As you become completely relaxed, allow yourself to imagine standing on a
rolling hillside. Feel the wonderous breeze blowing in your face and
waffling through your hair. Notice the blueness of the sky. Feel the wonder
of being alone. Feel you connection with the earth beneath your feet. With
the wind caressing you, feel yourself connecting with the sky. Below and in
front of you, you see a magnificent valley of brilliant colored flowers.
Feel a joy and excitement as you run down the hill. Roll and tumble as you
go, laughing with joy. Then stand up for you are on your way to forgiveness
and you must prepare an offering. Start gathering flowers for the offering.
Pick three beautiful deep red roses. Then pick three orange poppies from a
bed. Next you spot some green ferns and take three throngs of them. Then
you move into a bed of blue bonnets and pick three of them. Next you see
some majestic purple irises and you add four of them to your bouquet.
Finally, you see a bed of violets and as you walk out of the meadow, you
grab a handful of them to add to your offering.
Below, you see a huge slab of stone that is smooth and worn with perhaps
centuries of use. It is here that you sit and lay forth your offering. This
is the alter of forgiveness and you have come here to forgive yourself.
On the far side of the stone, out of nothing appears the ugliness you
choose to forgive. See (that you) filled with the worry and doubt, the
hurt, the anger and fear. See that ugliness of your secrets standing before
you. See what you looked like filled with anger, rage fear and doubt. Let
your imagination work to see the pure ugliness of that which you wish to
forgive. Don't gloss over it or fuzz it out; let it be clear. As you want
to turn away, look and see its ugliness, its lonesomeness, and its despair.
See how it has been cut off and tucked away, a skeleton in the closet, the
darkness of the recesses of your mind. See it standing in all this
ugliness. Let it be more ugly that it really is. Focus on it. It is easy to
love the beautiful parts of you, but it is these ugly parts that need your
love the most. And so it is, you stand up on your side, and with the
ugliness on the other you decide to forgive that ugliness for all the pain
it has caused you, for all the doubt, all the resistance, all the denial,
all of the successes you've turned your back on, all the opportunities you
have overlooked, because you were carrying this around with you. Reveal,
"I'm going to forgive you".
Now look down at your garland and see that it has turned into a beautiful
ball of shimmering light, a shimmering ball of translucent, purplish light,
and though it is shimmering and transparent, you lift and draw it to your
heart, and mentally talk to this ugly you. Say, "I forgive you".
Gently toss the ball into the air like a medicine ball and watch it go up -
up - up in slow motion. When it reaches the top, it pauses for a moment,
and then gently begins to descend over the top of this ugly you. As this
sphere lands on this ugly you's head and then extends its envelope, you
say, "I forgive you". As that ugly you, that shadow that you have hidden
for so long is surrounded in this bubble of forgiveness, all of its
ugliness goes away, all of its pain, and all of its fear goes away. Within
that purple is a bubble of light, it radiates a being of light and of love.
You walk around the stone and reach forth with open arms and embrace that
forgiven you. And you think and say, "You are forgiven, you are forgiven".
You've forgiven yourself. "Let it be. Let it be. Let it be".
Hold the embrace and let that part join you until you are one, and you
similarly glow within the shimmering bubble of forgiveness. Say, "Let it
be, let it be. And it is done"! And you feel the wonder, the aliveness, the
trust and the enthusiasm.